Remembering Who The F&%K You Are
Hey friends – welcome to this week’s blog about remembering who the f&% you are. This is not my typical blog full of information, this is a piece of my personal story that I think some people may find relatable. Feel free to skip and come back next week you just want to info, tips and tricks!
The Why & How
This began while I was working with a client on building self esteem and overcoming some negative thinking. I realized how powerful it can be to create some personal reminders designed to reinforce positive thinking. This has led to creating a number of resources designed with that in mind.
I dealt with some trauma in the last five years that impacted my self esteem often, and made me second, third and fourth guess everything I do or think or feel. I worked through an exercise I created called the “Umbrella of Authenticity” – and as part of that exercise, we write down all the things we know to be true about ourselves.
One night as I was getting ready to sleep, I was feeling a lot of fears and anxieties and so I decided to write myself a letter. This is how it came out.
My Letter To Myself
15 years ago, you were a struggling mother with ADHD raising two kids with vastly differently presenting ADHD. You were convinced that you were a terrible parent, your kids were broken, and that you surely weren’t all going to survive. 10 years ago you became an empty nester, had no idea what you wanted to be when you grew up, and weren’t sure you were good enough to do *anything*.
Two years ago you were not sure that you would survived after a series of traumatic events turned your PTSD into fully activated CPTSD. Every day was a struggle to get through, your mental health plummeted, you spent months and months isolating. You were sure you would never belong anywhere ever again, you were certain that no one outside of your home could be trusted, and you could not see the light.
You forgot who the f&%k you are.
This is your reminder – for the next time you need it.
You are a warrior, an advocate, a great mom, hilarious as hell, wise, and a force of nature. You have survived trauma, poverty, DV, mental health and chronic pain issues, cancer, foster care, workplace abuse, discrimination, shunning and more.
You are an amazing ADHD Coach who is going to help so many kids and caregivers. Your dedication to inclusivity, diversity, justice and authenticity have never waivered. Your passion about neurodiversity and queer issues have grown into opportunities you never dreamed of.
As you came out of your trauma-induced haze, you began to take control of your life back. You changed your name which helped you change your own perception of who you are. Do not let that slip away.
You are Kat Sweeney. You are all of those things above, and so much more. You are an ADHD Coach, a business owner, an entrepreneur, a co-host on Rainbow Roc radio show, Community Thrive Advisory committee member, secretary of the board of We Exist FLX, a 2024 honoree of Craig Walsh Monuments, and a neurodiversity advocate.
You are also formerly a Speak Out, Safe Zone, and Train the Trainer LGBTQ+ Facilitator, a kink and poly educator, co-founder of a large queer social group, and long time volunteer in Rochester Pride groups and committees, a Rochester Erotic Art Fest Volunteer, and leader of a social group for more than a dozen years.
You have handled and survived more crap than the average person, and you find a way to rise, adapt, and thrive. You’ve had cancer, a screwed up childhood, and have faced discrimination and abuse on multiple levels.
More importantly, no matter what you have faced – you remain a generous person with a deep sense of empathy and compassion for others. You remain dedicated to helping others. You continue to fight discrimination, to seek justice and equality and equity, to facilitate understanding and empathy, and to make spaces for people who need a place to belong.
You are also a quirky, sarcastic, imperfect person. You *like* the person you are. You are proud of the person you have become. You can’t wait to continue to grow and learn and find out who you will be in another 5, 10, or 15 years.
Don’t forget these things. Don’t Delay Joy. You are amazing.
One Last Thought
Thank you for holding space for me by reading my post, friends. I hope that you take a few moments to find a way to remind your self who the f&%k YOU are. I’d love to hear about what you are doing to keep who you are on the top of your priority list!
Consider writing yourself a letter. Or creating a visual to hang up. Or record yourself a message if you absorb things best verbally. Knowing who you really are will help you navigate your life and prioritize your choices. Writing this letter to myself made me feel strong and vulnerable, empowered and a little frightened, gratitude and remorse.
I will be back again next week, friends. Until then remember that you are amazing.